Tuesday, October 15, 2013

TCM Guest Post.... "Ink Works: A Tattoo Tale" By: Alaskandoll (Dixie C )

Ink Works: A Tattoo Tale
By Alaskandoll
Dixie C © 2001
Word count 3,271

Just a bit more and it’ll be done, he thought. She’ll be done, he automatically corrected himself. For three weeks, he’d listened to the tedious hum of the tattoo gun as Cole worked on her. Bill glanced over his shoulder to stare at her reflection in the mirror while Cole added the final details to the tattoo. The droning of the gun faded into the background as Bill focused his attention on her.

“God, she is beautiful. Who is she?” He’d asked Cole when he’d first seen the drawing while having his dragon finished.

Her skin; bronzed, like that of a sun-goddess, her long chestnut hair flowed freely over her bare shoulders. Her corseted breasts burgeoned lushly above her bodice; just the slightest hint of cinnamon areolas showed beyond the rise of the fabric. Long stocking covered legs crossed at the ankles and just a glimpse of smooth, rosy labia peeked from behind the g-string that covered her virtue. A thin black cord bound her hands in front of her. Likewise, her upper arms had been confined to her sides. Her dark eyes were half-closed in ecstasy and could only be described as mischievously sensual. While her glossy red lips parted in a perpetual moan.

“Nobody real,” Cole had answered. “Just a drawing. An image that popped into my head one night, so I put it on paper.”

Bill had become obsessed with the woman in the drawing, wanting nothing more than to have her for his own. After returning many times to study the drawing, he’d finally told Cole, “I want her, I need...I need to possess her. How much?”

“It’s still twelve hundred, Bill. But I thought you said your wife would have your balls on a platter if you got this tat done?”

“Yeah, well she’d prefer my balls on a platter anyhow. At least this’ll give her a real reason to put them there. For twelve hundred bucks she’s all mine right? I don’t want anyone else having her, ever!”

“Dude, you must be a lunatic! But hey, if you really want to buy trouble with your wife...for twelve hundred bucks, it’s all yours.”

Once started, he had been terribly disappointed when Cole had refused to work more than two or three days a week; claiming that Bill’s skin needed at least a minimal amount of time to heal between sessions.

Bill’s muscles tensed and flexed beneath the constant pain inflicted by the tattoo gun. Its needle piercing the tender flesh of his lower back again and again, was an exercise in monotonous agony. Cole was moving the needle from place to place, but it still felt as though he held the needle upon a single patch of raw nerve endings. The tattoo gun buzzed, a mosquito whispering sweet nothing’s into a sleepy ear. Bill surveyed the room around him, trying to distract himself so as not to dwell on the pain.

He was straddling a stool; his stomach and upper body resting on the foot of the lounge-like tattoo chair. It was hot in the shop and sweat glistened on his muscular upper body and coated the chair beneath him. He felt as though the flesh of his stomach had liquefied and melded with the vinyl of the chair. And he wondered, briefly, if his flesh would remain fused to the chair when he stood.

“Need a break?” Cole asked, interrupting Bill’s introspection.


“I said, need a break?”

“How much longer?”

“About 30 minutes, maybe an hour. I’m finishing the detail work on the lace gloves. When that’s done, we’re finished.” Cole said, stretching and reaching for his pack of smokes.

“Naw, let’s skip the break and just get her done,” Bill said, anxious to finish.

Sighing, Cole looked longingly at his smokes then nodded and went back to work on the tat.

Not quite an hour later bill stood looking over his shoulder with a hand mirror. “Damn. She looks good Cole,” he whispered as he gazed at her image in the full-length mirror behind him. “Fuckin’ gorgeous. Too bad she is just an ink work, huh?”

“Uh...yeah, sure. Done lots of, umm...interesting art work during my career.” Applying telfa-pads to the new tattoo Cole said, “You know the rules, so I won’t bore you with them again. Come back in two to three weeks and I’ll look over it and see if you need any touch ups.”

“Thanks. Thank you very much,” Bill said, carefully pulling his shirt over his head, then handing Cole the last two hundred dollars that he owed on the tattoo.

Climbing into his truck, Bill lit a cigarette. Drawing the smoke deep into his lungs, he carefully laid his back against the seat and prepared for the drive home.

At home, Bill slipped off his shirt. Lying down upon the bed, he fantasized about Angel. It was as though her image had been branded on his brain. Each time he closed his eyes he could picture her, bound and sitting before him, a stunning portrait of beauty. Regretfully, he opened his eyes when his back started to sting. The stinging similar to the pain of road-rash or rug-burn. The telfa-pad had adhered to the ointment creating the sensation of a tickling itch that couldn’t be scratched. Annoyed, he got up to remove the pads, but even after doing so the itching didn’t cease. Lying down upon the bed again he finally managed to drift off to sleep, dreaming of Angel.

“Well, I see you got your whore finished,” Nadine said, startling Bill awake.

Here we go again. Same shit, different day, Bill thought. “Jesus Christ, Nadine, she’s just a fucking tattoo, give me a break.”

“Yeah you’re right, she’s just a fucking tattoo. Nothing out of the ordinary about a tattoo of a woman in bondage on your back,” she said, standing to leave the room.

He knew the conversation was over - she’d dismissed him. “Wait. Can you put some of this ointment on my back for me?” He asked quietly, holding out a small foil packet.

“Oh whee-ha! Gee, can I really? That’s just what I wanted to do, lube up your whore. You’re just too fucking good to me, Bill.”

“Good Lord woman. ... What the fucks your problem now?” Bill shouted, clenching his fists tightly, digging half-moons into his palms. Rope-like veins stood out along his neck and temples, throbbing, as several years worth of repressed anger struggled to free itself. Somehow, he managed to choke it back again.

“No problem,” Nadine said, snatching the foil packet from his hand. She bit the edge with her eyeteeth, tore the top off, and squirted the clear ointment onto his back. She rubbed it roughly into his tender skin and he flinched, sucking air between his teeth in a hiss. But, he kept his mouth shut. No sense pissing her off anymore than I already have, he thought.

“There, your whore is lubed.”

Bill turned to thank her, but Nadine had already left the room.

He’d expected her initial backlash. After all, another female tattooed on her husband’s back would piss off most any woman. What he was having trouble with was her continued reaction to Angel. He hadn’t expected her anger over the tat to last this long. He’d figured that by this time she’d have accepted Angel as just another tattoo. Just like his others. A purple and turquoise dragon resided on each of his shoulders. He had typical skull and castle ink work on his biceps and a skull-faced joker and king on the outside of each of his calves.

Bill shook his head and laughed at the idea that his wife could seriously be jealous of a fantasy woman. Even if that fantasy woman was extremely sexy, she still amounted to nothing more than dye injected beneath his skin. But, she is beneath my skin, Bill admitted to himself. She constantly lingers just below the surface of my thoughts, waiting for a chance to push her way into my mind.

Don’t be ridiculous, he told himself. She’s a tattoo, just a fucking tattoo.

Bill lit a cigarette and went to find Nadine; she was in the kitchen frying chicken for dinner. He stood in the doorway appraising her athletic body as she cooked. Seeking a truce, he walked up behind her and slid his hand between her long lithe legs. His hand followed the crack of her round ass to the top of her ass, over her hip and then wrapped around her narrow waist as he pulled her against him.

Kissing her neck he said, “Mmmm that sure smells good. I’m starving. And speaking of smelling good...you smell pretty tasty yourself, my dear.”

“Gee thanks,” Nadine said, tilting her head sideways so that his lips could better access her neck. “Compared to fried chicken, how romantic.”

“Yeah, whatever,” Bill said. He turned, kicked over the trashcan, and stomped from the kitchen.

Sitting alone in the living room Bill ran over a list of what made Nadine, Nadine. She hated her job at the gym. Hated his job, because he didn’t make enough money. She had no close friends and hated his friends. She didn’t get along with her mother or his for that matter. Maybe, she just hated him? They had no children. But, they had never wanted rug-rats. Then the thought surfaced, like a dead fish in a pond. Was her biological clock ticking? Could that be what was driving her mad? Driving her away from him?

“Dinner’s done, come eat,” Nadine called from the kitchen. The sound of her voice shattered Bill’s ruminations. He rose and plodded back into the kitchen.

Dinner passed in an uncomfortable silence. Bill gave up on the hope of conversation after making a couple of attempts that gained him nothing more than a scathing gaze. Nadine did see fit to look up occasionally and scowl, but that was her only acknowledgement of him. Tired, stressed, and aching, Bill told her goodnight and went to bed.

Lying on his stomach, he fell into a light sleep. He didn’t know how much later it was when the bed shifting beneath Nadine’s weight disturbed his sleep. In his state of semi-sleep, he heard her huff as she caught a glimpse of Angel reflected in the sparse glow given off by the night-light in the bathroom.

Bill came fully awake sometime later, when he thought he heard someone choking. Turning his head, he looked at Nadine; a soundly sleeping silhouette outlined in the meager glow from the night-light. After watching her closely for a minute or two, the sound was not repeated and he lay back down and closed his eyes.

A short time later, a cool hand upon his shoulder startled him awake. The fingertips slid down the side of his back, carefully avoiding his new tattoo. Continuing downward, they brushed over the tops of his buttocks and then just barely grazed the hair on his ass as they slid gently down his crack. Bill shivered at the light touch and goose bumps crawled across his skin like living things. The fingers slipped between his partially splayed legs and tenderly caressed the underside of his balls and he moaned quietly.

It had been a few weeks since he and Nadine had had sex and Bill found himself more than ready. During their marriage Nadine had rarely initiated sex, so to say he was taken aback by this sudden aggressiveness would be an understatement. He thought of a joke he had once heard. What do men consider foreplay? A half an hour of begging. Bill didn’t find the joke funny because that was exactly what his sex life had been reduced to. Nadine didn’t like oral sex, giving or receiving; she’d told him once, “It just doesn’t do anything for me.” Of course, her body told him a completely different story; no matter how much she denied liking it, her body seemed to love it. So Bill would beg and plead until she’d finally give in and let him go down on her.

He loved pussy, loved everything about it, but he definitely loved to bury his face in it. He longed for the smell, the taste, and the moans; he especially delighted in the moans. Because with the moans came the wild bucking and thrashing, her hips grinding her pussy hard against his face. Her clit slip sliding against his nose while he licked, sucked, and inhaled her ever-intensifying scent. While Bill contemplated his passion for pussy, Nadine’s fingers continued to stroke his sac, his cock grew harder by the second.

He felt hot breath against his back, followed by the pressure of warm lips. The lips moved down his back pursuing the same path that the fingers had taken, until they reached the apex of his crack. He gasped as he felt a moist tongue slide down one cheek of his ass and then up the other. “Wh...What are you doing? Nadine, have you lost your mind?” Bill asked, stunned by this new sensation. She had never done anything like this, would never do anything like this. Hell, he practically had to pay her to blow him. “Shhhh,” was her only response.

Bill stopped thinking about reason and motive and thought only about what was happening now. Nadine’s hand slipped from between his legs and moved to his hip, urging him to turn over onto his back. Bill hesitated briefly, knowing that the sheet would stick to the ointment on his back, not fatal by any means, but it sure felt -- well, oogey was the best he could come up with to describe the feeling. But as Nadine’s tugging became more insistent, her lips moved to the top of his hip and he let her fingers guide him onto his back. He clinched his teeth in anticipation of the slight discomfort, which surprisingly never came.

He relaxed again as her fingers traced a path over the front of his hip to his pubes, stopping only briefly to tug gently at the hair before moving downward to gently caress his balls again. As she breathed, her aspirations teased his cock. He moaned throatily when she pressed her lips to it and began applying soft kisses to the head. Her tongue slithered wetly over the length of his shaft and when she again reached the head, her mouth opened and engulfed him. “Oh god, yes,” he said softly.

Reaching down he caressed the smooth slope of Nadine’s back, his hand slipping over soft flesh before stopping at silk. The feel of silk beneath his hand puzzled him; she never wore silk to bed. She generally slept in an over sized T-shirt and panties. She had silk nighties and lingerie, but she wore them only when she was feeling frisky. This hadn’t happened too often lately. Considering her attitude earlier this evening, the silk only added to the surrealistic quality of the sex and made him wonder if it was all only a very vivid dream. Dream or not, Bill decided to simply go with it. As little sex as he had gotten recently, he wasn’t going to be turning down anything, even if were only a dream.

He slid his hand over her bare ass, then down between her thighs. Grasping her, he pulled gently on her leg, indicating that he wanted her to spread for him. She obliged. The first thing his brain registered was moisture; the second, that her pussy was hairless, his fingers found only smooth slick flesh. Bill pulled his hand back and tried to sit up, but Nadine pushed him back with her free hand. She shifted and rose to her knees in one smooth motion, without releasing his cock from her mouth she was suddenly straddling his face. Bill had a single moment to think this must be a dream, before he was smothered by the scent of her lust. At that moment, all but the thought of the banquet that had been set before him left his mind and he buried his tongue in her over heated flesh.

He lost himself in her, delighting in the feel of her smooth skin on his tongue and her passion flowing slickly down his chin. He reveled in the moans that she uttered around his cock. The vibrations from her moans were driving him insane with the need for release. He could feel himself growing harder and grunted to tell her that she should move. But, she didn’t move. She reached out to cup his balls in her hand and massaged them as she took him deeper down her throat. She pulled back until just the head of his cock was left in her mouth, sucking deeply as she writhed on his face. Bill lost control, the semen bubbling forth under impossible pressure filled her mouth, and all he could do was whimper with ecstasy. He had made the mistake of coming in her mouth once before, she had sat up and spat it in his face. Bill stopped licking and waited in expectation of having his semen spat in his face, but there was nothing to spit. Bill heard her utter a barely audible, “Mmm,” before she bent and licked up the remaining drops of come as they oozed from the tip of his cock. Finished with her clean up, she lifted herself into a sitting position over his face. “Don’t stop now Lover. I’m just getting started,” she said.

Not Nadine’s voice. Soft and smooth -- it was red silk on black lacquer. Total seduction. Panicked, Bill pushed her from his face onto the bed. Turning he reached for the lamp, his hand pausing in mid-air when she asked, “Are you sure you really want to turn that on?” His hand wavered -- he wasn’t sure, but he didn’t know what else to do. His finger pushed the switch and the room filled with somber light. Bill spun back around and lying on the bed was not Nadine, but Angel.

“H...h...how?” was all he managed as he staggered to his feet to stand at the side of the bed.

Angel arranged herself on the pillows and smiled seductively up at him. Like magnets to steel, Bill’s eyes were drawn downward over her body. With her legs unabashedly splayed open before him, her fingertips played idly over her bare slit. “Does it really matter?” She finally asked. “The how of it, I mean.”

Bill took several steps away from the edge of the bed. “You’re not afraid of me are you, Bill? After all ... I am just a fucking tattoo,” she said, using the exact words he’d used to describe her to Nadine.

“Where’s Nadine? Where’s my wife?” He demanded much more calmly than he felt.

“Aww, miss the nagging bitch already, Bill? Don’t worry; she’s close by. Just hanging around -- so to speak,” Angel said, her voice still silky smooth. A sardonic smile twisted her beautiful face; she lifted her free hand and pointed to the mirror over the dresser.

As her implication registered in his muddled brain, Bill flipped on the overhead light. Grabbing a hand mirror from the dresser top, he turned his back to the mirror. Horrified by what he saw, he gazed open-mouthed at the reflection.

Nadine, still in her t-shirt, tattooed on his back. Her position identical to that of Angel’s; eyes half-closed, mouth parted sensually, arms bound by thin strips of black cord. He watched, immobile, as the turquoise dragon on his right shoulder blade opened its mouth in a malicious grin.

DGC ©2001 May not be reproduced in any manner with out permission from the author.

Wednesday, August 21, 2013

Rizzo's Ramblings...Double Standard

So yesterday a popular blogger posted a picture of a bunch of candy bars and sugary drinks atop a magazine with the headline "Diabetes and You". Her caption for the photograph was "I went to Walgreens to pick up a prescription...and diabetes!" Here is my issue with this. Said blogger has over two hundred thousand followers. TWO HUNDRED THOUSAND!! She has published a book which is being sold in national chain stores, and she advocates for autism awareness. Going as far as soliciting money and running marathons for it. She knows how big her influence can be. She has used her platform to raise awareness for something that a lot of people are uneducated about. She has done many good things for autism. Now, the comments on her diabetes dig were things such as "mmmmm diabetes". Or you tube videos of the gentleman who pronounces it "diabeetus". Or "ha ha I told my pharmacist the other day while he was bagging my candy that I would be back for my diabetes meds". Tell me why it is ok to joke about a chronic illness that is misunderstood on a platform that you use to advocate for another chronic condition? Do any of you think the above autism meme would fly? If someone cracked a joke about breast cancer (using misinformation and judgmental material) to over 200,000 people would it be taken lightly? If another published author made the same comment about diabetes would people still defend them and say it was "just a joke"? I am the first person to get gallows humor. My God, if I didn't laugh I would cry. The problem is I am not standing in front of 200,000 people when I crack these jokes. When my daughter was first diagnosed any crack about diabetes really hurt her. People still to this day think we somehow caused her to have diabetes. People are uneducated. They don't understand. Somewhere out there in those 200,000 people is a newly diagnosed child of diabetes crying their eyes out and a parent who is still trying to figure out what they could have done to prevent their child from "getting" diabetes. These women who get "Facebook famous" writing blogs and publishing books need to be held to the same standards that anyother celebrity is held to. That or they need to go the hell home. I am sick of people making excuses for these women's cruel remarks. Have I said stupid things before? Yep, sure have. I apologized afterwards. Then I educated myself. Was I educated about diabetes before my daughter was diagnosed? Hell no! I didn't know jack shit about it! I also didn't crack jokes about it to over two hundred thousand people. As a matter of fact, I'm pretty sure it never entered my mind. With great power comes great responsibility, and some of these women need to keep that in mind before they open their mouths.

Thursday, August 15, 2013

Rizzo's Ramblings... I call bullshit

So one of our local news anchors posted a status on Facebook saying that Kroger tracks all her purchases so she was going to interview a senator and ask how the government could decide whether to increase or decrease a person's benefits without tracking their purchases and knowing what they buy. That immediately pissed me off. She is in the "small government" "trickle down" line of thinking, and yet she wants the government to track and monitor what people buy with their food stamps. She posts all the statuses allowing people to bitch and complain about their tax dollars helping people buy food. Now those same people want to pay for this program. And you know damn good and well it's going to cost a helluva lot of money. Doesn't this go along with the NSA reading everyone's email? But, as long as the government is monitoring what groceries the less fortunate buy then its ok? I'm getting sick and tired of people not minding their own god damn business. If I hear another person whine because "the person in front of me bought a steak" or "the person in front of me had an iPhone" or "the person in front of me drove a nice car" I'm liable to kill someone. No one knows WHY a person gets assistance. Maybe they just lost their job. Maybe they work 2 jobs and have decent credit. Maybe the car or the iPhone was a gift. Maybe that god damn steak was the only one they will get all month. People need to start worrying about their lives and their dinner table and stop worrying about everyone else's. If they want to piss money away then instead of paying the government to monitor more shit that is none of their business they should donate it to a charity. And by the way, a cash register will kick out something that is not "eligible" for food stamps so that a person has to pay cash for it. If she is concerned about how the government will decide how much or how little food stamps a person will get then I have a solution. They can look at the cost of food, the person's income, and the number of people in the family and make a fucking common sense decision. Last time I checked common sense was free!!!

Tuesday, August 13, 2013

Frenchy's Follie's.... Chill, momma's! Love me some F4F

You know that I'm feeling passionate about this to sit down after working my ass off all summer to write this blog.

Adam at Fodder 4 Fathers has been going through lil bit of hell after posting a blog early this morning. Well, an "Open Letter to First-time Mothers" as he calls it. Read his post here.

I feel sorry for him.

I agree with him though!

Very few women don't bitch and gripe when they are pregnant.  However, I was one of them! I looooooved being preggo! My friends joked the shit out of me for it. It is a beautiful gift and men do not get to experience it. Although your significant other may be an asshole, there are guys out there who are wonderful too! They envy the closeness we get to share with our babies while they are in utero. I wasn't a fan of having to spend money on clothing that I wouldn't be able to wear for very long, personally. I did enjoy registering for all of the cute baby stuff and I have to admit with both of my boys, I brought my girlfriends to shop and create my baby registries, not my husband. Also, my baby showers were both female-only. The men really do get the shit end of the stick here!

Admit it, we do not treat the father as an equal in parenting! We DO think we can do everything better. We DO think that we are more tired. We DO pull the "I pushed the baby out of my vagina/they ripped that baby out of my stomach" card. We pull every card we can to make it seem like the fathers do nothing for the children when we need them to do something else for us! I'm sure that makes them feel awful. If you are still in a relationship with the father of the baby, stop jerking the baby away from the dad and saying "Give her to me, I know how to make her stop crying."

That's insulting. That's messed up.

No. Let the father do it. Let him feel a sense of accomplishment. The same feeling when we picked out all of the baby furniture and clothing. The feeling of accomplishment when that last push released the baby from our body. The same feeling that we had when we saw our baby for the first time and realized that we took such great care of our bodies for 10 months and look how good we did!!! What a beautiful healthy baby! All that hard work paid off.

Ladies, there are good men out there. These men are frustrated at the moms that aren't giving them any credit or even the opportunity to be a father to their children. They are tired of the attitude and not having any say over the care of their child. It's not just "your" child, remember. Enough is enough! There are good daddies out there, even if you didn't choose such a great one to procreate with. THAT WAS YOUR CHOICE, BY THE WAY!! It's important for your child to have an equal relationship with both parents. Unless he has been deemed a danger to the child, you must learn how to let go and give the father a chance to do his part.

Every situation is different. Maybe you have a baby daddy that is NOT truly capable of caring for a child for whatever real, honest reason. Yeah, I'm pretty sure this isn't the person Adam is talking about in the blog.

My wish is for people to read something (like this open letter) from an author and realize its feelings, perspective,  and definitely not personal insults TO YOU !!!!! I always soak these things in and LEARN something from them!!! It will make you more compassionate, human, and you get to know the inner workings of people this way. Just think about it, that's all I ask.


Monday, August 12, 2013

Frenchy's Follies... "Shine On" Blog Award

Frenchy here from The Crazy Mothereffers!!!! Thank you Saltwater Sessions for the "Shine On" blog award! I've been busier than a one-armed pimp at a bitch slapping contest but IMMA still do this ;) Here are the rules....

Step 1: Repost the "Shine On" picture above
Step 2: Link your blog post back to the person who awarded it to you (Thank you Saltwater Sessions)
Step 3: Seven facts about me:
Step 4: Award 15 of your favorite bloggers that haven't yet been awarded by anyone else!
 Seven Facts about me.....
1: I opened a hair salon when I was 26.
2: I just started wearing dresses this year.
3: I'm addicted to sushi.
4: I look horrible as a blonde.

5: I've never been on Pinterest or played Candy Crush!

6: I do not go into REM sleep naturally, therefore if I go to sleep without an alarm in a very dark room my brain and body wants to sleep for extremely long periods.

7: I stress out wayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy too much.

Riz, my dear cousin and co-admin on the page tagged some bloggers in her award acceptance, I will tag a few of my favorites as well!!!! Congrats!

The Musings of Munch

Wine and Psychotherapy

Hey! You're a crazy bitch!


Rizzo's Ramblings... TCM Blog awards Shine on MotherF*ckers!!!

OK so here's the thing. I have 3 smokes to get me through this blog post and I just ate dinner. (Fried tillapia, broccoli and cheese rice, and broccoli but I don't blog about that shit because someone else is, ya know?) Anyway, I had just gotten home from the registration/orientation for my brand new freshman daughter :'( when Frenchy texted me and said we had gotten some blogging award thingamajig and she was working and could I answer some questions and link up to 15 blogs. (15??? For realz???) I said I could after I cooked dinner, but then I said maybe we both could do it so you guys could hear from both of us. Then she said I could go first, which was great because that means I get to use up all the blogs... HA! I don't really know what the hell is going on. There is this theme going on. Shine on. Over at Saltwater Sessions they said we had to include this pic:
They made some great musical reference in the blog where they received the award here, but all I can think of is Shine on, Motherfuckers!! And so that it shall be. Now, there are some rules to this award. One of which being that I repost that pic ^^^^, another one is I have to post 7 facts about me, and the last is I have to share 15 blogs and give them the award. (Always a string attached, amirite?) ;)
SOoooo 7 facts about me:
1) I'm an asshole.
2) I only have 2 smokes now, getting ready to be 1 because I smoke like a freight train.
3) I have to go buy smokes in the rain. :(
4) I'm a procrastinator.
5) I am 5'7" tall
6) I never feel good enough or like I do enough.
7) I am not good at in person social situations. I am a nervous freak.

Now on to the good stuff. I don't know if I can come up with 15 blogs. I will try. There are a few at the very top of my list though. I hope you guys have already heard of them because they are fucking awesome! So to you guys I am getting ready to link:  (You are getting their Facebook pages, damnit. It's the best I can do...)
SHINE ON, MOTHERFUCKERS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Fruits and Nuts

Tripping While Standing Still

Epic Adventures in Motherhood

A.D.D. Music Mamma

Fodder 4 Fathers

You're The Worm in My Tequila

Gah! I got 6 you guys! I am almost out of smokes! Frenchy will be posting some more for you! Oh and HEY you are supposed to repost our blog/Fbook page in the blog where you hand out your awards. Kind of like I did for Saltwater Sessions ;)
Peace out!

Thursday, June 20, 2013

Rizzo's Ramblings...Hi! I'm Rizzo and I'm currently.....

GOING OUT OF MY MIND. Or I am already gone out of it. The other day (yesterday?) I announced that I would begin fundraising for a Diabetic Alert Dog for my daughter. I do that. I get to a point where I am tired of talking and reading about it. I have to start somewhere, sometime, so why not now? I have gotten in touch with a trainer and there is one family ahead if us. We. Are. Next. Well, hold on a minute here. What? We are next? Wait. 
At some point, (about 5 minutes after the happy dance) I realized I was going to have to interact with people. Initiate conversation. In person. Gah! It is pretty scary, I have to admit. I'm all right behind a keyboard. I have time to formulate my thoughts. I get infinite time to backspace and proofread. Sometimes, I will spend 10 minutes agonizing over what to say. When I do that I usually just "select all" and then hit the backspace button! You don't really get that opportunity in real life. My huge fear right now is that at some point contacting the local media is going to be a must. I have a strategy that allows me to hold off on that a bit. (I wrote a blog about procrastination...) 
I'm pretty sure this is going to be one of the most challenging things I have done in my life. It is going to be SO worth it!! I hope you guys will bear with me because I am sure I will be blogging about this quite a bit. 

I really appreciate you guys "liking and sharing" that page for me. Much Love!! -R-

Thursday, June 6, 2013

Rizzo's Ramblings...Drugs, Drinks, or Donuts

Yesterday I tempted Fate. I knew when I did it that it was a bad idea. When I said "Bring it on, I can handle anything!", I knew I was asking for it. I should not have said it. I should not have asked Fate to do her worst. Although, to some of you, what I am about to say will surely be nothing in comparison to what you are going through. It is really nothing in comparison to what Fate could have dealt. But, I should not have asked for it. You see, a couple weeks ago I got some lab results from my Type 1 daughter's endocrinologist that said her kidney's had begun to show damage. My daughter is 14. The story of her diagnosis can be read here. There is a picture in that blog of a month's supply of pump supplies. My daughter no longer pumps insulin. She is back on the injections. Seven a day. Her sugar is more controlled on injections and we desperately need that control. According to her lab results, now more than ever because her kidneys are beginning to fail. At any rate. Back to yesterday. Yesterday was a scheduled call from her insurance company's Diabetes Managed Care Plan Registered Nurse. I had SO MANY questions about her kidneys and those lab tests. The registered nurse was very alarmed at first. Yes the creatinine/microalbumin ratio test result was very high. Yes, that is a bad sign. Did they test the BUN and creatinine serum levels in her blood? Yes. Yes, they did. Those results were normal. All of a sudden the registered nurse for the insurance company asks me if my daughter could have been on her period when this urine sample was taken. I say, yes, my daughter was on her period. She made an issue of it when she gave the urine sample. She didn't want to pee in a cup. The registered nurse informs me that this is most likely WHY protein showed up in my daughter's urine. (Blood IS protein). The registered nurse informs me that the blood lab work results show that my daughter's kidneys are working PERFECTLY. (Cue the angels singing on high and tears of joy and gratitude and me thanking the nurse profusely.) Then, when I woke my daughter up to do her morning sugar check, her blood sugar was 96. That is the HOLY GRAIL of blood sugars for my daughter.After a snoopy dance in the hallway, I got dressed, got in my car, and headed to work. The sun was shining, the sky was blue, and I said to Fate "Bring it on! I can take it!'. Because everything was wonderful. Because my daughter's kidneys are perfect. Because her blood sugar was perfect. Because I am an idiot. Everything at work was non descript. Not too may rooms to clean. None of them were FUBAR. I got out at a decent time without too much cussing or fighting as is want to happen throughout the day where I work. I got home and I made the mistake of checking my mail. I NEVER  check my mail when I know there are no bills in it. I will go weeks without checking it. (I know the mail lady hates me, but it is not for that reason.) Within that small metal box was an ad flyer and my 16 year old son's report card. My brilliant, funny, handsome, 16 year old son. I shouldn't have opened it. I should have thrown it away with the ad flyer. I should have waited for a few weeks. I should have burned it in effigy. Anything besides open it. Because within that envelope, mailed so innocently from the high school, was Fate's punishment to me. For all intents and purposes, my son FAILED the tenth grade. Not because he isn't brilliant. Not because the classes were too hard (even though he WAS in Pre AP English), but because he is a lazy, non motivated little shit. He also failed Algebra 2. The WHOLE FIRST SEMESTER was a line of "F's". The second semester you could tell he tried to not fail, because they were all "A's" and "B's". He passed his Pre AP English SOL with a pass advanced score. But he failed for the year because he didn't do his work. Fate kicked my ass yesterday. Handed it to me on a plate, even. Fate reminded me that there is a reason I should never say "Go ahead, make my day". I am NOT Dirty Harry. I am a plain old housewife. I can NOT handle whatever Fate has to offer. As a matter of fact, I don't WANT to. So, I apologize to Fate. I would even kiss Fate's ass if need be, and that is saying a lot because I kiss ass for no one. With that being said, I have to go. I have to find drugs, a drink, or some donuts.

Saturday, June 1, 2013

Rizzo's Ramblings...Mental Health Day

As you guys know from my Facebook update this morning, I played hooky from work to lay out in the sun. Well, not JUST to lay out in the sun, but also to spend time with my daughter and to recharge my batteries. From previous blog posts, you (should) know that I am a housekeeper for a hotel (motel?). I have been working 6 days a week sometimes cleaning 20 or more rooms in a day. I was their only housekeeper for a month or more until I had a small meltdown and threatened to quit if they didn't get me some help. They *did* hire someone else, but she is so slow that it takes her four times as long as me to get the job done. That means that I get called in on my "day off" because she can't handle the workload. This happened just this past week. So, today, I called in with a fake ailment so that I could have a day off. I probably wouldn't have done it if A) I had actually gotten a day off this week *or* B) the other housekeeper hadn't gotten TWO days off this week *or* C) it had been raining or a crappy day. I told my employer when I was hired that when school let out for summer break I would need no less than TWO weekdays off. The reasons being that I do not want to leave my 16 and 14 year olds home alone to their own devices five days a week, and because I like to spend time with them. Surprisingly enough, they like to spend time with me, too, and I am going to take advantage of that for as long as I can. School let out last Wednesday. The first day off I was supposed to have got blew all to hell because there was more than ten rooms and the other girl is slow as owl shit. I got the call, I broke the plans I had made with my kids, and I went to work. When I woke up this morning and the weatherman was predicting the perfect summer day with a high UV index I made up my mind to take a mental health day. I called in early enough for them to find someone to cover for me (whether they did or not I don't know). I told them I had suddenly come down with some terrible malady and that I would be unable to work today. I immediately woke up my teenagers and asked them what time they needed to be up in order to get ready to go to the town pool at 12 when it opened. (Don't you love how I woke them up to ask them what time they wanted to be up? I hate it when people do that shit to me! <insert maniacal laughter here>) My son had been up until 4AM gaming with his friends, so he didn't want to go. My daughter wanted to be up at 11. That meant that from 6AM until 11AM I got to sit on my ass and do nothing but watch Facebook and drink coffee. At eleven I got my daughter up, and we were at the pool by 12:30. For the record, I am kind of funny about swimming in a public pool, *especially* with about 20 small children in it, so all I did was soak up the sun. There is nothing more relaxing to me than lying under the sun on a cloudless day and basking in the heat. It's the only time I *like* to sweat. Yes. I know all about skin cancer. I'm a fair haired, fair skinned, freckly girl so I have been warned about skin cancer A LOT! But guess what? I smoke, so I have bigger cancers to worry about!! Besides, the vitamin D is ESSENTIAL to my well being! I swear vitamin D from the SUN is a mood stabilizer. I am happiest when I have soaked it up on a regular basis, and I have a beautiful tan. Think perfectly fried chicken golden brown. That's me. Guess what I use to attain it? Butter!! (No joke. Best tanning "oil" I have ever used!) While I enjoyed a mega dose of vitamin D, I also enjoyed getting to watch my teenage daughter frolic in the water with her friends. Hearing her laugh is one if the best things in this world! So this evening I am relaxed, recharged, rejuvenated, and ready to work tomorrow. I will be in such a good mood for the next few days that it would not surprise me if my boss asked me to be sick more often!! Everyone needs a mental health day! If you have not had one on a while, I *highly* recommend you take one promptly! Now, if you will excuse me, I am going to turn in early because baking in the sun always makes me sleepy. I hope you guys have a great day tomorrow. I know I am going to!!  ( And remember: Take *all* the mental health days! Rizzo's orders!)

Monday, May 6, 2013

Frenchy's Follies... Obama care???

So, just curious.... anyone real knowledgeable on the oh-so-fabulous Obama care? Seems like we don't know much about it, and they are rolling out the online exchanges in about 6 months. Do you even know what an exchange is?

I think it's a little odd that we don't know much about this. Why do we have to wait until 3 months before we are forced to get this health care to know how much it's going to be? Most people need to prepare for added expenses like this. Seems poorly planned in my opinion.

The exchange is going to be an online place for buying your health care. Yep I said "BUYING". You will have to pay for it or you will have an extra "tax" for not having health care. How that is legal I have no idea. It is penalizing you for not having health care. Isn't that your choice??? The only people that will get health insurance for free is anyone making under $15,000 that qualify for Medicaid. Everyone else has to pay something for it. In fact, from my research, Obama care may be just as expensive as health care now through an employer. Sooooo.... how is this so great again?

Anywho, I want to also get you thinking about some things that haven't even been addressed at all! How will the all the hospitals, doctors offices, drug and supply companies prepare for this influx of people that will now be going to the doctor when they sneeze a couple of times? I already have a month long wait to see a specialist and urgent care centers have extremely long wait times. Don't you think we could have prepared for that as well? See, if I were president, I would have rolled out some sort of incentive back in 2010 when this was introduced, to get people to go to medical school. Like, pay for a portion or all of tuition to medical school. Especially since new doctors will surely see a decrease in pay with the government reimbursing doctors offices and hospitals even less than private insurance companies have over the years. Give incentives to people that choose to still enter the medical field since they all be working harder for less money. Then this year there would have been a bunch of doctors graduating from basic medical school that could have worked while they went into a specialty program. I mean, think about it!!!

And what about the quality of health care? Supposedly drug companies and medical supply companies will be getting less money for their products. I'm pretty sure this will decrease the quality of the products, and with the doctors cramming more people in, I would think that will cause a drop in the quality of health care as well.

Will we still have co pays for doctors visits and surgeries? WHO KNOWS!!! Will there be a deductible you have to meet every year WHO KNOWS!!Isn't that strange?!

Since I own a small business, let me share with you what I know about that from Obama's own website. Any business with 50 or more employees is required to offer health insurance through an exchange of private health care companies. If they don't offer it, they are penalized $2000-3000 per person. So lets say you have 70 employees. How will you afford to pay for health insurance for all of them? You can't! But you can't afford to be penalized either! So you have to let 21 people go and make the other 49 work harder. Don't you think this will impact the economy drastically come January? Along with the blow of less money for the same things from the medical community? I mean, when we were given a "stimulus" of an extra $20 a paycheck that was supposed to help the economy sooooooo much. So won't these penalties, potential layoffs, and drastically low reimbursements hurt the economy sooooo much too?

My friend works for a company with about 650 people. They estimate that they will have to pay out an extra 1.5 million dollars a year to insure people that may not even WANT health insurance! Why couldn't we just regulate regular insurance companies? Holding the insurance companies accountable for not spending the premium money, and making them reimburse people that money like the Affordable Care Act is doing right now. Not allow for pre existing conditions and caps on benefits, like the Affordable Care Act is doing right now! Making female and male health insurance premiums the same like the Affordable Health Care Act is doing now. WHY COULDN'T WE HAVE STOPPED THERE?!?!

Don't you know there is a reason that people come to America for the best health care? Don't you think that changing the dynamic of it THAT MUCH is going to fuck it all up?!?! And what if it does? Can we pretend it never happened and go back? And will they change the name to the UNAFFORDABLE Care Act if it is as expensive as they are now thinking it may be?

The biggest question at all though, is this.... Are we willing to fuck up the entire medical industry, to then be paying almost the same money we would have for our individual or group insurance anyways?

Friday, May 3, 2013

Rizzo's Ramblings...It's been a while

It has been a few weeks since I have posted a blog. Not because there is nothing going on in my life, but because I went back to work. It isn't something I had planned on doing. Not that we don't need the money. We ALWAYS need the money, I just had not planned on going back. I work for my step daughter as a housekeeper cleaning motel rooms. It's a little bitty hole in the wall motel mostly used by truckers and people pulling off the interstate for a few hours rest before the get back on the road. I went back because the two housekeepers she had quit without notice. That made me the only one. So, I have been working six days a week. The money is not spectacular. I don't get paid by the hour, I get paid per room. $3.50 for every checkout and $1.75 for stayovers. So, in other words, I get paid three dollars and fifty cents to strip and remake 2 queen beds, take out all the trash, dust, scrub a sink toilet and bathtub, mop the bathroom floor, and vacuum. That doesn't include the idiots who feel like they can trash the place because someone is getting paid to clean up after them. It really is a dirty job. In the past two weeks I have cleaned over a hundred rooms. So that's 200 beds changed, 100 toilets scrubbed, 100 bathtubs scrubbed, 100 bathroom sinks and counters wiped down, 100 floors mopped, 100 floors vacuumed, 200 trash and emptied, 100 dressers dusted, 200 nightstands dusted, etc etc. I have been getting Fridays off. In three weeks I have had three days off. That is usually the day I clean MY house. Today I just can't do it. I'm tired. My back hurts. I have bruises on my knees from scrubbing bathtubs (when I lean over the side my knees hit the edge of the tub). On the bright side, I have lost ten pounds. I'm pretty sure that is the only bright side! So, the next time one of you guys check into a motel room do someone a favor and try to hit the trash can when you throw your trash away. Or try NOT to piss in the bathtub (how does that happen anyway?). Better yet, if your kid isn't completely potty trained put a pull up on them even though you aren't the one who has to change the sheets in the morning. And for God's sake LEAVE A TIP!! No one does and it really sucks. If people don't start appreciating their housekeepers they may just find their sheets dirty and their sinks full of hair. Just sayin'! This has been a PSA for housekeepers everywhere...

Sunday, April 28, 2013

Frenchy's Follies... Crazy kids! Out of the mouths of babes...

As a mom, I can tell you that I have been absolutely stunned silent by some of the crazy and outlandish questions my two boys have asked me. I mean, where do they come up with this stuff? No worries! From now on you will never be put on the spot by those little rascals again!

"Mommy, why don't you stand up to pee like I do?"

This one *may* call for a live, peeing-standing-up demo, momma. Trust me, no matter what their age, they will instantly understand why we sit down to pee.

"Who is God? Why can't we see him? Where does God live? What is heaven?"

Do not pass go. Do not collect $200. Go directly to the nearest church, drop off the brats and pick them back up in a few days. Viola! Problem solved!

"Why does my pee pee get big sometimes?"

Ummmmm, parents beware! There is no good answer to this question. Just make up some crazy ass reason so they won't want to touch it again until puberty.

"Do you have to pay to go to work?"

ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME?!?!?! Next question....

"Why is there hair growing on your privates?"

Duh! So it makes them harder to find. Kinda like an adult version of hide and seek, kiddo.

(Usually yelled loudly in public) "Why is that person so oldfatshortugly?"

DO NOT ANSWER THIS QUESTION! Just slowly walk away and whisper to the person "Whose kid is that anyway? He's a rude little bastard isn't he?"

"Why are you my mom?"

Because I pushed your 10 pound chunky little crying ass out of my teeny tiny vagina, that's why!

"Why don't girls have a pee pee?"

Your instinct tells you to make up some kind of scary shit... go with it! Tell them you had one and you cut it off and fed it to the dog. The look on their little face... PRICELESS!

"Why do we always pee when we poop, but we don't poop every time we pee?"

Go ahead and pre-print  the diagram of the sphincter muscle that I have provided. This question comes from left field and will totally catch you off guard. Afterwards, be prepared for a nasty-gram from the teacher who is wondering why the hell you taught your child the word "sphincter". It's such a fun little word for a first grader to say, isn't it?

When in church, during the offering, as you are putting your money into the basket.... "Why do we have to pay to see God?"

Good fucking question kid! <---- Am I right?!?! These kids are smarter than we think, I tell ya!

Whether you think I'm an idiot or a total genius for providing you with these very useful answers to you child's burning questions, I'm a total fucking genius. Hopefully you have realized that I'm joking and that I would never say these things to a kid. Under the age of 2, at least. I was going to write about something serious, but there are too many bad things going on in this world and it's depressing all of us. It was time for a break from all of that.

You're welcome.

A kindergarten student told his teacher he'd found a cat, but it was dead. "How do you know that the cat was dead?" she asked her student. "Because I pissed in its ear and it didn't move," answered the child innocently. "You did WHAT?!?!?!" the teacher yelled in shock. "You know," explained the boy, "I leaned over and went 'Pssst!' and it didn't move." (courtesy of stargazersrealm.com)

Tuesday, April 16, 2013

Frenchy's Follies... Battle of the Buldge

 I’ve always been heavy set. Even as a young girl I had chubby cheeks and a thick waist. My mom never really cooked too much and had absolutely no problem feeding me and my little sister fast food for every meal. She never ever monitored any of the food that we ate and always had kitchen cabinets FULL of junk food. I grew ginormous boobs at age 8, got my period at 9, and bad acne at 12. I was being joked for all of those things at school. As I became a teenager and my parents split up, I really started packing on the pounds.  I was becoming paranoid about it and had an especially hard time when we ate at my grandparents’ house every Sunday. My grandpa would make fat puffs-of-air-in-the-cheek faces and hold his arms out wide joking me behind everyone’s back. He would analyze every single bite of food I would put in my mouth, and talk about it in front of my whole family. It was embarrassing to say the least.  No one dared to tell him to stop because he was the “head of the family”. It made me feel like shit. There were a couple of times I called him out on what he was doing when he made those gestures and thankfully he stopped doing it. I managed to wean myself from junk food one year when I was in high school but I became so obsessed with losing weight that I was only eating saltines and I was down to 5 saltines a day. I was severely malnourished and when my friends realized what I was doing they threatened to tell my mom and they bought me lunch at school and forced me to eat it. I know what my problem was/is and I gained control over it (for the most part) about 9 years ago.

  I am a food addict.

 And I’m serious when I call myself an addict. I literally crave food like a drug. I get a “high” off of sweet and sugary things just like a coke-head gets off on snorting cocaine. When I’m sad, I want food for comfort. When I’m happy I want it for celebration. If there is any kind of pie, cake, donut, ice cream I binge and eat every bite of it in one sitting. It usually starts with me telling myself “I’ll just have a bite”. That very quickly turns into four of five more bites and then it gets to be more and more until it’s all gone. I mean like a dozen doughnuts gone. Or like an ENTIRE CAKE gone. It’s a weird vicious cycle of going in and out of the kitchen over and over. It’s like it calls my name! I cannot STOP once I start. I don’t purge, because thankfully I HATE to throw up. But I get very pissed at myself for binging and obsess about it for days and sometimes even weeks after I do it!

  My highest weight was 225 lbs. (I’m 5’8”), and I was a size 20! That was right before I turned 21 and the new weight loss drugs Fen-Phen and Redux were FDA approved. I asked my family doctor if he would prescribe me one of the drugs and he decided Redux would be the best fit for me. I dropped tons of weight and was really happy with the way I looked for the first time in my life! The drugs made me full of energy and never hungry.  A year later they pulled the drug off of the market because people were dying from taking it. They also found out that the drug could cause irreversible heart damage. I was more upset that I couldn’t take it anymore than worried about dying from it. I was involved in the Class Action Lawsuit for both of the drugs and was sent to a Cardiologist to see if it had affected my heart and I was in the clear, thankfully. After stopping the drug, I steadily gained all of the weight that I had lost back. I stayed heavy for about 8 years after that. About a year before I got pregnant with my first born, I knew that if I wanted to start a family I needed to lose weight. I was starting to cook for myself and my husband and was having luck with some of the healthier recipes. I knew that if I put on 40 pregnancy pounds ON TOP of how heavy I already was that I would be miserable and never lose the baby weight. So I set a goal for myself and started a weight loss program to get my eating and portion sizes under control. I did that for about 9 weeks and lost 20 pounds! I then started cooking healthy transitioning to regular food and continued to set small goals for myself. I made Sundays a “cheat day” so I wouldn’t feel completely deprived of the things I loved. I realized this couldn’t be called a “diet” very early on. I had to start a new way of “life”. This was the only way I could ever take the weight off and keep it off for good. I then had my two baby boys and both times managed to slowly lose the pregnancy weight and get back into my “skinny” clothes (size 12, which isn’t even considered skinny in this day and age!)

 Currently I am having a new battle with my food addiction. I have moved into a new home that needed a major kitchen renovation and I am just now unpacking my dishes and pots and pans. For almost two months I have been living off of frozen meals and fast food. Although my choices have been smart, like grilled chicken sandwiches and side salads instead of fries, I have still cheated more in these couple months than ever and I have gained 7 pounds because of it. Just last night we had our first healthy meal at the new house and I’m trying to get back on track. But I’m having a REALLY hard time. The sad thing for me is that I gain weight very quickly and it’s really hard for me to lose it once I gain it. I can’t really do a lot of exercising because of my back being so messed up (you can read about my back problem here) I’m honestly scared to exercise and screw something up in there with all of that metal holding me together! Walking is about the only form of exercise that doesn’t end up causing my back to lock up.

 Whenever I run into people that I haven’t seen in a long time they always make such a big deal over how much better I look (which actually makes me feel like shit, I mean, I guess I looked pretty fucking awful for all of those “fat” years!) and they want to know my secret. So I thought I would share it with you guys.

 The secret is to treat it like any other addiction. You are constantly fighting the battle. Every day. Every meal. You have to consciously say NO to the bad for you foods and YES to the healthy ones. And you have to stick to that every single day for the rest of your life. You have to be really careful not to fall off the wagon, so to speak. Just like with alcoholics, it can only take one bite of something to send me spiraling back into my crazy food addiction. A “diet” means that you get onto a program that you will eventually get back off of. This is no DIET. This is a new way of life for me that I will have to consciously live, forever thinking about what food I put into my mouth. A great support system or a friend wanting to make this life changing decision with you is a great way to keep on track. And no matter how many times you cheat, don’t give up! You can always start fresh the next day eating your regular healthy foods. If you choose to change your life you may not see results for weeks and no one may even notice your weight loss for months, but KEEP THAT LIFESTYLE CHANGE UP! You won’t regret it when you see what an impact it will make on your life for the better. I’m glad I changed my life and I’m back on track now and I WILL LOSE THOSE 7 POUNDS DAMN IT!



Wednesday, April 10, 2013

Rizzo's Ramblings...My adventures in Redneckistan

As promised, here is a look into my life in a small town filled with ignorant people. As some of you who read the blog know, my daughter was diagnosed a type 1 diabetic a few years ago. (If you are not familiar with that story, you can play catch up here.) Last Thursday I received a letter in the mail recalling her insulin pump. On Friday morning I called her doctor's office to let them know her pump had been recalled, and to request a prescription for syringes as well as the information needed to calculate and give her the correct does of insulin. Taking care of type 1 diabetes is detail oriented and involves quite a bit of math. I will try to explain it as best I can so that you can understand the story I am about to tell. When a diabetic (please keep in mind that I am referring to type 1. I have no experience with type 2, and it is a whole different ballgame) wakes up the first thing they have to do is check their blood sugar. Normal range varies for everyone, but for my daughter anything between 70 and 150 means she does not need any insulin. If she decides to eat, however, then she has to count the number of carbs she will be consuming and calculate how many units of insulin she will need to "cover" those carbs. Her carb to insulin ratio is 7 grams of carbohydrates to 1 unit of insulin. So, if my daughter were to eat 14 grams of carbs, then she would have to inject 2 units of insulin. That is, as long as her blood sugar was somewhere between 70 and 150. If, for some reason, her blood sugar is higher than 150, then she has to inject extra insulin to bring her blood sugar down to within the "normal" range. This is calculated by a sliding scale. All sliding scales are based on each individual. When a diabetic is on an insulin pump the doctor programs the pump with all this information and all the diabetic has to do is put in the number of carbs they will be consuming along with their blood sugar and the pump will calculate it all for them and give the correct amount of insulin. So, on Friday morning when I called the doctor for syringes, I also had to ask for a sliding scale. I called the doctor at 10AM. By 3PM I had not received a phone call back from the doctor, and the pharmacy had not received a prescription for syringes. I called the doctor's office back. I was assured that the message had been passed on to the nurse practitioner and that all would be taken care of before the end of the day. AT 4:57PM I still had not heard anything and so I called once again. This time I was on hold for a few minutes when a nurse (I have never spoken to before) came on the line and informed me that the nurse practitioner who was supposed to be taking care of this for me had went home for the weekend! Keep in mind that I had received a letter in the mail recalling my daughters insulin pump because it could, at any time, give her a dose of insulin that could cause serious injury or death. The nurse that I was speaking with saw the importance of getting my daughter off the pump and was happy to call in the syringes, but could not tell me what sliding scale to use because she was not familiar with my daughters case. I still had the sliding scale that we were given three years ago when my daughter was diagnosed and so the nurse and I agreed that anything would be better than risking keeping her on the pump. The sliding scale that I have is in increments of 60. So if my daughters sugar is between 150 and 210 she gets an extra unit of insulin on top of what she eats. If it is from 211 to 270 then she gets 2 units. This continues to increase by 60 with each added 60 being another 1 unit of insulin until she reaches 5 units. On Monday I kept my daughter home from school just to make sure that she was going to continue to do well on the shots. I also wanted to hear from the doctor's office to see if they were going to make any changes. I did receive a call from them, but it was only to ask me what scale I was using and to ask me when we would be getting the pump back. I didn't really understand that question because I am not the pump manufacturer and I do not repair them. Tuesday morning I went with my daughter to the school to explain to the school nurse what had happened and to give her the syringes and dosing information she would need to make sure that my daughter got the insulin required. At this point, the school nurse informed me that without written and signed doctors orders she could not allow my daughter to have insulin injections. This school nurse is well aware that my daughter is a diabetic. She has seen my daughter everyday at lunchtime and insists on helping her to program her pump even though my daughter is 14 and has been on a pump for 2 and a half years. This nurse is well aware that the only thing keeping my daughter alive is insulin. So, I told the nurse that I would not be able to leave my daughter at school knowing that they would not allow her to have insulin. I then asked if it would be an excused absence since the school was the one with holding my daughters medication. The nurse told me I would have to speak with the principal about that. So, I went to the principal and asked her if it would be an excused absence and the principal told me that I would need a doctor's excuse because I had failed to get the doctor to fax in the proper paperwork to the school in a timely fashion. SO, I took my daughter home and immediately called the doctor's office and requested that they fax in the orders to the school as well as doctor's excuses for Monday and Tuesday. Yesterday afternoon at 3:15PM the school nurse called me to say that the doctor's office had, in fact, faxed in the orders but that instead of writing out a detailed sliding scale they wrote 1 unit/60 >150. That means 1 unit for every 60 points greater than 150, which is the sliding scale that I had written out in detail for the nurse and given to her just that very same morning. The nurse informed me that she could not accept that from the doctor and until she got a detailed scale faxed into her office she could still not give my child her insulin. She then went on to say that if I chose not to send my daughter in to school on Wednesday (today) I would have to talk to the school principal about getting it excused. That is when I informed the school nurse that I really didn't care if the absence was excused or not. I really had no choice in the matter because if they were not going to allow her insulin then I was not going to allow her to attend. I made it clear to that nurse that as far as I was concerned she had a doctors order and with holding my daughters insulin, should I choose to send her, would be a crime.  THAT is what I have been dealing with the past few days! So, you will have to understand when I rant and rave about people's ignorance and having to live in Redneckistan.

Thursday, April 4, 2013

Rizzo's Ramblings... The wonders (and horrors) of Facebook and other social media

I have had a Facebook account for years. I have had an account since the people who made it were automatically your friends; when Myspace was THE place to be. In the beginning, it seemed like Facebook was being used for people to connect with (or stay connected to) family and friends who were far away or whom they had not seen since high school. That is still what I primarily use it for to this day. Over the years it seems like it has become a place for society to judge people. Rather harshly, I might add. People put a lot of private information or pictures on Facebook for their friends and relatives to see.If they don't have privacy settings set a certain way all that information becomes public. There are a lot of teenagers (mine included) using social media today. Some of these kids have no qualms about posting embarrassing pictures or videos of themselves or others because they think it is funny. They don't mind posting that they got suspended from school for fighting or cursing at a teacher. They don't mind going on someone's wall and telling them what an awful person they are, or that they don't have any friends, or enough money. There have been a lot of reports of children harming or killing themselves due to bullying that has happened on social media sites. There is a name who comes to mind when I say this. Amanda Todd. She posted a video on YouTube telling about how she posted nude pictures of herself to someone and they were leaked to her family and friends. Then the kids at school started bullying her. She tried to move. She tried counseling. She tried a number of things (including this video) to get help. She ended up killing herself. At some point she drank bleach. I, personally, have seen children (who go to school with MY children) tell people to "go drink bleach". I always wonder what their parents think. I know their parents have a Facebook account, because they are my "Facebook friends". I wonder if they are "friends" with their children on Facebook  I wonder if they even go look at their kids' walls. I always want to make a comment on those kids' pages or their parents pages saying "Are you kidding me?", but I don't. Mostly because I am a coward. I am not a very social person, and I don't hide the fact that I don't go along with the crowd, so many of the moms around here do not have a very high opinion of me. Which transfers to my children. Especially my daughter because she is just like me. She stands up for the underdog and she is not afraid to tell someone they are being an ass even if the person she is telling is the most popular kid at school. I am proud of my daughter for standing up for people, but I constantly worry about how she is treated by these kids. If their parents allow them to say things like "go drink bleach" on Facebook  can you imagine what they say at school when their parents aren't around? Some of you will say that there are teachers and faculty at the school to handle things, but we live in a small town and the adults have the same mentality as the middle schoolers as far as friends and cliques and popularity goes. It is kind of disturbing. The whole point of this blog is to discuss what I saw on Facebook this morning There is a new page. "Tag Someone Who" is the name of the page. They post a meme and in the comments they want you to tag some who relates to the meme. Here are a few of the ones I saw this morning. "Tag someone who will never get laid". "Tag someone who eats like this" (With a picture of someone shoveling food into their mouth)  "Tag someone who thinks they got swag" "Tag someone who has been raped by a sloth". SO on and so on. I am REALLY disturbed by this. Being a teenager was so hard without all the social media, internets, etc, I cannot imagine what it is like for kids today. Why is it necessary for them to make it so much harder? What happened to building each other up and helping each other out? What happened to being there for one another? Thankfully, I have made some REAL "Facebook friends" whom I have never met, but feel a kinship to. These women are funny and kind and empathetic and sympathetic and honest about their struggles. They are non judgmental. They have a kind word for everyone. They try to help people. They use what they have been through in their lives to lead the way. They are a light shining in the darkness. THAT is what social media should be used for. THAT is what we need to be teaching our children! SO, with that being said I am going to ask YOU, as responsible adults, to REPORT these pages that promote bullying and judging of others. It is OUR job to protect our children. It is OUR job to police the social media they are using. I am not asking you to scold the children that are using these pages to be mean to others. That is for their parents to do. I am asking you to help take down the pages that promote such things. If we take a stand against it, then maybe we can make a difference. I am sure Facebook is not the only place where it is possible. However, I do not use any other social media sites and have no idea how they work. I DO promise that, if you tell me what to do, I will sign up for them all and help take a stand on them as well. It is time that we try to create a place of peace for our children. It is time that we begin teaching love and acceptance again.. It is time that we take the power away from those who would wield it to hurt others, and put it in the hands of those who would use it to help. It is time for a Facebook revolution. Who is with me?
                                                                  This is what MY daughter posts... What about yours?

Sunday, March 31, 2013

Frenchy... on Gun Control

Please don’t judge me.

Open your heart and mind. Just simply UNDERSTAND another human being.

If you don’t agree with me, that’s acceptable. I’m not trying to change your mind. And you won’t change mine either. AND PEOPLE, THAT’S OK!

 Riz and I feel differently about many things. We don't see eye to eye with politics and we totally disagree on most issues. But what's cool about us is that we have a mutual RESPECT and LOVE for each other that surpasses all of this. All of this HATE. We both wish that everyone could enjoy the absolute fucking AWESOMENESS that we have. We can have a disagreeable conversation with total admiration for what the other person stands for. There is only one reason this works. ONLY ONE.

It’s called EDUCATION. We are both extremely knowledgeable about current political issues. We have spent hours upon hours of researching. We know our shit. We have REASONS to feel the way we do and they are real and legitimate and they aren’t based on campaign lies.

Gun control is back in the news again. The support for tougher laws is waning. I’m pretty sure that you won’t find many people that will argue against universal background checks. Clearly we need more funds for security in schools and to treat mental illnesses that cause people to kill. No one has forgotten those children in Newtown, Mr. President. Don’t you think that it’s slightly fucked up that our president is implying that we have forgotten those precious children because his gun proposals aren’t getting the attention he wants? I’m super offended by his shaming! If I could say one thing to him it would be “Don’t you dare use those kids as a pawn in your gun agenda!”

Did you ever think that maybe it was the "crazy" that killed those children? Not the

Just like a "criminal" robs a store, not a "black, white, or brown guy"?

It takes a sick person to harm or kill someone. Normal, average people own guns for protection, and they kill criminals that enter their home and threaten their families. Some people collect guns as a hobby. Some hunt with them for food. Killers that don’t have guns, guess what people? THEY STILL KILL! They use knifes, chainsaws, rope, AIRPLANES (9-11), poison… must I go on? I keep hearing the same thing over and over about how “fewer children would have died” at Sandy Hook if guns were regulated more. I don’t believe that. Adam Lanza would have held those kids hostage and killed every one of them.  Because a killer is a KILLER. Take away the guns and guess what? Crimes still happen. What about Steubenville? No guns there! Meredith Kercher, the beautiful young woman who was murdered in Italy in which Amanda Knox is accused, she was CUT AND STABBED. Would she be any more dead now if she was killed by a gun?

I want to share a gun quote I saw when doing my research. This will totally get your panties in a bunch. PLEASE, just think about it.

"People tell me I don't need an AR-15. My answer is I don't need one any more than Rosa Parks needed to sit in the front of the bus”

She wanted to sit in the front. She didn’t NEED to. She would still get to her destination no matter where she sat. But it was her right as a human being living in America to sit where ever she damn well pleased. And it’s my right as an American to own a gun.

I’m not racist so get that fucked up thought right out of your head. But do you know our Bill of Rights? I’ve read it over and over recently and you should too. The right to have and bear arms is just as important as freedom of religion. Now let this one soak in for a second….

We didn't take away Muslims right to worship in America because Muslims took down the Twin Towers.  

Read that again. We didn't take away Muslims rights to worship in America because Muslims took down the Twin Towers.

Now, ask yourself this question.

Why then would we ban high capacity clips and assault rifles because a psycho killed children?

Taking away our rights as gun owners is like limiting the time for church services. STOP JUDGING AND READ THESE TWO STATEMENTS BELOW.

The right to have and bear arms… BUT only if it’s not an assault rifle and you only have 10 bullets.

Freedom of religion… BUT only if you aren’t Baptist and you only worship for 20 minutes each Sunday.

See what I did there?

The fact that you could care less about my rights as a gun owner isn’t the point. The point here is that these two statements above are EQUAL IN EXAMPLE. If we start allowing our government to control and change these rights that we were given WHERE WILL THEY STOP?

Speaking of equal, we all are. And that is why gay people should be allowed to get married. Not allowing them to is actually ridiculously against what America stands for. Present times do warrant change. But changing the laws on gay marriage is still staying within the confines of our Constitution and our Civil Rights as Americans. We aren’t TAKING AWAY ANYTHING. We are GIVING. Don’t compare the two things because they are undeniably different.

Stop shit talking the people that don’t agree with your stance on debatable issues. Tell me how your verbal abuse and name calling is any different from the words coming out of the mouths of the people that think that the Steubenville girl “got what she deserved” when she was brutally raped. Seriously. JUST LISTEN. Respect them for standing up for what they believe. Applaud them when they know the true facts that they base their opinions on. Be proud that someone KNEW WHY they voted for their presidential candidate, and didn’t vote based on some totally dumb ass uneducated reason.

My only hope as you leave this blog-debate that I challenged Riz to, is that you respect us for sharing our point of view. I have no clue what her blog will be like but I do know one thing. She is a smart, beautiful woman who knows her shit and I’ll listen to her side any damn day of the week. I am so PROUD of her. She can hug every goddamn tree in America and I’ll follow her around take the fucking pictures to prove it to you!

If you could do me one favor and share BOTH of our blogs about gun control, you will certainly win an award for being a TOTAL BRAVE BAD ASS, and true bad assery is hard to come by these days.

Thank you for allowing me to share my thoughts with you. I will return the favor with the utmost respect for your beliefs.














Friday, March 29, 2013

Rizzo's Gun Debate

Before I get into my discussion about gun laws and why they should be altered to make this country a safer place, I want you all to know that I am in no means a fanatic. I own a gun. It was given to me by my brother for protection, and it is in my top dresser drawer with ammunition should the need arise to shoot someone. Do not think for one instant that I would NOT shoot someone who entered my home illegally and threatened to harm myself, or my family. It is a small caliber (.25 I think) pistol with a 9 round clip. I don’t know enough about it to tell you whether it is a semi-automatic or automatic, but I DO know it does NOT have to be “cocked” before every fire.  That being said, I do NOT carry this gun around on my hip (legally, in the state of Virginia, I can without a permit) and I have never fired it. Not even to see if the aim is off.  I do not believe that guns should be completely outlawed like they are in Britain. I DO think this country has a long way to go as far as gun laws are concerned. Let’s look at the second amendment. It states:          A well-regulated militia being necessary to the security of a free state, the right of the people to keep and bear arms shall not be infringed.  By well regulated they mean capably trained. Regulated, back then, did not mean to be encumbered by laws or government. SO we will reword this. A well trained militia being necessary to the security of a free state, the right of the people to keep and bear arms shall not be infringed.
 First, I want to talk about why this may or may not have been important to add as an amendment to our constitution. Let’s look at what had recently transpired in our country. We, as a country, had just won our revolution from Britain. One of the most important factors in that war was our militiamen. Private citizens who were armed and formed a militia to fight against the British. Most of these militiamen had fought against the indians, or their fathers, brothers, or uncles had. They were well trained. Also, I am sure that, being a new country with a new constitution (which we know some people did not agree with) there were some people who were afraid of government tyranny. What better way to guard against it than to amend the constitution to say to the government that the people could and would rise up if they were being oppressed.  Now, today, I cannot say that this is a valid argument. Most private citizens are not well trained when it comes to using the tools of war. If there were to be an uprising today, it would take one of our major branches of military to lead the charge because we are just not capable of fighting against them. Our military is equipped with state of the art weapons like unmanned drones, tanks, tactical gear, and the government has nukes for crying out loud. There is no way an army of private citizens could rise up and think that they could stand a chance against our government if our branches of military were on their side. SO, in my opinion, that in itself makes void the argument that private citizens need machine guns with 30 round clips in case they ever needed to rise up against oppression. The argument is, a lot of the time, if the government has it then we should have it too. It is our right to protect ourselves from the tyranny that government can sometimes become. I say – good luck getting the uranium and plutonium to arm yourself with the nuclear devices our government has access to. It is not going to happen, and if it does, you won’t have to worry about fighting in a war because you will be in some prison under the ground somewhere for terrorism.
 Another popular argument is for the hunter. They need their guns so that they can go out and kill deer, squirrels, bears, birds, ad nauseum.  I know quite a few people who hunt. Some for sport, and some because they actually feed their families that way. I would NEVER want to take away their guns. I WOULD want to regulate what guns they are using for hunting. The last time I heard, if you had to use an AK47 to kill a deer, then you are doing it wrong. How did people feed themselves and protect themselves from bears before these guns were manufactured? They are just not necessary. So, the hunter’s argument is gone.  Keep your rifles, your pistols, and your shotguns. Keep your scopes and your 10 or 12 round clips. Give back the assault rifles and machine guns, because you just do not need them.
 There are some people who would say that we are Americans. This country was founded on freedom. It is and should be our right to have any gun we want. For this argument, we are going to look into some of the massacres that have occurred over the past couple of decades, and some of the laws and regulations that go into purchasing a gun. In 1999, in Colorado, two teenage boys walked into their high school armed and killed 13 people, injuring 24. It took about 49 minutes from when they began to when they killed themselves.  In 2007 a Virginia man entered his college campus and killed 32 people, injuring 17. It happened in two separate incidents over a two hour period. In 2012, a man entered a theater in Colorado and opened fire killing 12 people and injuring 58 in a 15 minute time period. In 2012, a young man entered an elementary school where he butchered 26 people (20 of them under 8 years old) in less than five minutes. In more than one of these cases it was later found that the perpetrator had a history of mental illness. They were all Americans living with the same freedoms that we all are afforded. So, if we use this last argument, they all should have been allowed to have those guns. I just cannot get on board with that.
 Let’s take a look at what goes into a mental health check when purchasing a gun. Keep in mind that all of the background and mental health checks can be avoided by buying through a private citizen! (It has been estimated that private sales provide for 40% of gun transactions) First, the buyer fills out a Bureau of Alcohol, Tobacco, Firearms and Explosives (ATF) Form 4473 by hand, providing simple yes or no answers to a series of questions about criminal, mental health and substance abuse history. The dealer then queries the National Instant Criminal Background Check System (NICS) database maintained by the FBI via a toll-free telephone number or through the NICS E-Check System online (in a handful of states the dealer contacts the state police who in turn contact NICS). This instant computer check searches the NICS database for any disqualifying records that would prohibit that individual from buying a gun. During the check, the system does not disclose to gun dealers any actual information about these records. Dealers are simply seeing one of three responses from NICS on their computer screen: proceed, denied or delayed. The specific disqualifications related to mental health are quite narrow. Under federal law, an individual is prohibited from buying or possessing firearms if they have been “adjudicated as a mental defective” or “committed to a mental institution.” A person is “adjudicated as a mental defective” if a court — or other entity having legal authority to make adjudications — has made a determination that an individual, as a result of mental illness: 1) Is a danger to himself or to others; 2) Lacks the mental capacity to contract or manage his own affairs; 3) Is found insane by a court in a criminal case, or incompetent to stand trial, or not guilty by reason of lack of mental responsibility pursuant to the Uniform Code of Military Justice. . A person is “committed to a mental institution” if that person has been involuntarily committed to a mental institution by a court or other lawful authority. This expressly excludes voluntary commitment. There is no guarantee, however, that a formal record of adjudication or involuntary commitment will find its way into the NICS database. Often disqualifying mental health records go unreported by the states. In Colorado, for example, only about 1% of people who have disqualifying mental health histories have been reported to NICS.
Another problem is that few Americans suffering from serious mental illness ever come into contact  with the “system” or receive treatment for their condition(s). According to the National Alliance on Mental Illness (NAMI), approximately 10% of children and adolescents suffer from mental illnesses. Yet only 20% of this group have been diagnosed and are receiving services. Looking at adults, approximately 1 in 17 live with a serious mental disorder such as schizophrenia, major depression, or bipolar disorder. Yet less than one third receive mental health services.  
 So you see, unless you have been involuntarily committed, or judged to be mentally unstable by a legal entity, you can purchase a gun! If you are one of the thousands of people without health insurance and you have mental instability, but cannot afford to go to a doctor, your gun rights are safe! The man who committed the shooting in the theater in Colorado actually gave his therapist a notebook detailing how he was going to do it before he did it. He had been diagnosed as schizophrenic He had no business buying, operating, or being allowed in a home with guns! If you are convicted of a felony in this country, no matter if it is a violent one or not, you are not allowed to occupy the same home or vehicle that any gun occupies. It is an automatic 5 years in prison. If you are a felon and you get out of jail or prison and have to move in with your parents who are NOT felons they have to get rid of their guns. However, if you are mentally unstable, you can be around all the guns you like. This needs to change. I also think that people who are on high doses of medications that cause serious side effects, or are used to control mental stability should not be allowed to be around guns. If you are so nervous that you have to take more than a 1 mg bedtime dose of Klonopin, Xanax, or Ativan then you do not need a gun! I know, because I have been there. I have panic attacks. I was prescribed 1 mg of Klonopin 4 times a day to help me deal with my anxiety. I was a zombie! I am not saying that I could not function on a day to day basis. I am not saying that I did not know what was going on around me. I am saying that I should not have been allowed to purchase a gun while on that medication! It alters your decision making abilities. If your medication has a sticker on it that says you can’t drive a car, then you should not be able to buy a gun! There are plenty of people ( myself included) who have minor problems (such as panic attacks) and find other ways of dealing with them, such as meditation or yoga. Once the medication has been stopped, and you are cleared by a physician then perhaps you could own a gun. I also think we need to start holding these mental health doctors liable for their patients whom they do not report as being possibly dangerous. Before you go off about costs and insurance let me tell you that I am a bleeding heart liberal and I believe that everyone in this country should be able to have the same health care benefits our government receives at the same cost they pay for it! I also think that the mental health system in this country needs to be changed. There are more and more people developing anxiety and depression problems because of stress and pressure brought on by their employment (or lack of) and the stigma of seeing a psychiatrist needs to be removed. More insurances should pay for more mental health services.  I could go on and on. The mental health background checks will do no real good until people start receiving the help they need.

 In conclusion, let me say that I do not think guns should be banned. As I stated in the beginning, I own one. I would shoot an intruder without a second thought. I do think that regulations need to be put into place to take the assault rifles and huge clips off the market. I think we should go back to owning normal rifles and handguns. I believe that mental health and its lack thereof plays a huge role in these massacres that keep happening more and more often. I believe that if you want to carry a gun anywhere outside your home that you should have to be licensed, and that you should have to take more than just a couple hour safety class. I believe that if you own a gun, yearly mental health checks should be required. If you own a gun you should have to recertify for that license just like you do to drive. It should be annual. I think that if the two sides could sit down and come to a compromise using common sense that this would not be an issue. I don’t want to take away your freedom, but I do not want to have to live in fear that an unbalanced kid will show up at school one day with a gun. None of the victims ever thought it would happen to them. None of the perpetrators families ever thought they would do what they did. Until it was too late.
*Please remember when you discuss the 2nd amendment that it was written in the 1790’s. This illustration shows the difference between guns then, and guns today.